“The father instantly replied, “I do believe, but help me not to doubt”
Mark 9:24 NLT
After spiritual birth comes the tension of spiritual growth. The new life imparted to us by faith in Christ comes into a consistent collision with the old nature that is still inside us, the nature that has governed all our lives in the darkness of sin. As light came into our soul by faith in Christ a real tension is experienced. Tension between the spirit and the flesh, between self effort and faith and the adjustment is never easy.
It’s not going to get away as long as we are in this mortal body. Somehow the tension between faith and doubt exist as a persistent reminder that it is not our design to be independent from God. And that our freedom in Christ is not a declaration of independence but a declaration of dependence on Christ alone. This is the way we overcome the tension not by getting rid of it but by total surrender daily to Jesus. It is a timely reminder of Chuck’s Swindoll that our goal is progress not perfection. This is really comforting as well as convicting.
The statement of this nameless father in the gospel of Mark is not only true for himself, in the same manner I think if feel the same. Part of me says God is trust worthy and then a moment later I doubt his trustworthiness. Like ants in the pants doubts keep faith moving. Yet to a certain degree it’s so frustrating that we are unable to really become stalwart saints of great faith. I think progress starts when we admit the tension instead of hide it. It’s called vulnerability.
The existence of such vulnerability must not be used as a license to remain hostage of fear or to wallow in unbelief rather it is a jumping board to find help from God that we may live by faith. And by that we mean trusting that God will do what is right in his own eyes, that’s faith! The naïve ones have tried to erase the tension by giving false hope or putting the blame to someone’s defective faith, especially when things don’t turn out the way we expect them to be. Because of the tendency to doubt many chose to doubt the authenticity of their faith. It’s comforting to recall that Jesus did not rebuke the man for his statement.
Admitting doubt and desperately asking for help is the beginning of victory over the spiritual tensions. Yes it won’t go away, but God makes a way that we overcome and experience victory in Christ. The tension is dealt with when we admit it and CRY to God for help! As we probe deeper in this new life we see more spiritual tensions between our ways versus God’s way, our desire versus God’s design and many more. Again what matters most is as we face these challenging and irritating tensions we can rely that our Lord walks with us! It really helps when we say admit our helplessness that we may find help from Jesus! The goal is progress not perfection and pretending we’re strong won’t help!
Rev. Arnel Tan
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